Numb

It was strange feeling such anger. I’d never been angry with Sage before, never felt so hurt, so betrayed – not by anyone, but especially not by her. The pain was so intense I felt like I’d been physically attacked. Everything ached – inside and out – and I wanted to lash out, to hurt her like she’d hurt me. Or worse.

“Please, Kenna! Please! Just listen to me!” She pled, her eyes wide and weepy, her expression sincere, concerned, and cloyingly, disgustingly needy. I turned away.

“No. You’re wrong. Ian isn’t one of them; he cares about me,” I insisted, surprised that the wrath I felt only sounded cold when I spoke. I turned back to look at her, so she could see the ire, the rage in my expression, afraid she might not hear it in my tone. She reached out as though to touch me and I stepped back. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”

“We have to talk about it. It’s important! It’s life or death! It’s YOUR life or death!” She shouted. I cringed, her voice was louder than it should have been, louder than my thoughts, louder than any earthly sound. My head throbbed and a warm, sticky liquid dripped out of my ear and down my neck. Slowly, I reached up and dabbed at my neck. My fingers came away red and my stomach clenched when I realized what it was. Something in me knew she’d done this and when I looked up and saw her staring at me, mouth open in horror, I knew she knew it too.

“Blood,” I whispered, my voice cracking in dread. “What did you do, Sage? What did you DO?!”

She was quiet for a long time, too afraid to speak. “I – I don’t know. I didn’t do anything! I’m sorry!”

Her obvious distress was too much to bear because though I was furious and hurt, she was still part of me and I still cared about her. But she’d betrayed me when she spoke to them and I didn’t know how I’d ever be able to trust her again.

“Leave. Go away. I never want to see you again.” I turned back to my house, dismissing her.

“Kenna! Please! You have to listen to me! I saw it! I saw it!”

“I SAID LEAVE!” I roared and pushed her straight into the street as a car rounded the corner. She stumbled backwards and just as she righted herself, the car barreled into her. I closed my eyes and covered my ears, and still the sounds of screeching and screaming and smashing overwhelmed me. I couldn’t think, couldn’t see, couldn’t feel. I was numb. Until I wasn’t.

I didn’t mean to didn’t want to it was an accident what did I do…

I fell to the ground sobbing, the concrete scraping my knees, slicing me open. After what felt like hours, days, years, I braced myself for the horror, opened my eyes, and there was nothing. No blood, no car, no wreck. No Sage.

I brushed myself off, stood up slowly, and walked inside the house.

*          *          *          *          *

NOTE: I submitted this piece to another contest I didn’t win. It’s another piece of Kenna and Sage’s story, though I’m not sure this scene will actually be part of the novel. Feel free to leave your thoughts, friends! But, as always, be gentle.

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