This Friday is your wedding day. I wanted to write something meaningful, something beautiful, something worthy of the day and, more importantly, of you. I wanted to say something clever and funny and sweet, something that you’ll remember forever, something you’ll open when you need a smile or comfort. I wanted to share some brilliant advice for surviving marriage, but I’m still figuring it out myself so I don’t really have any.
So, I’ll say this instead: It has been such a pleasure being your big sister.
Growing up, you may not have known that. Most of the time I didn’t act like the sweet, caring, big sister, the big sister who only gives her little sister a hard time to teach her life lessons but always ends the day with a hug. I was, instead, the stern, superior, asshole big sister who was either teasing or ignoring her emotional little sister. And there weren’t many hugs. Differences in age, temperament, and interests kept us from being friends for far too long. It wasn’t until we grew up and I was a slightly lesser asshole and you were slightly less emotional that we started to like each other. Over time, we’ve even become friends.
And I’m so glad that we have because you’re incredible, little seester. Over the past few years, you have grown and changed so much. You’ve figured out who you are and what you want. You’ve embarked on a successful career. You’ve met a great guy (yay, new brother!). You’ve figured out how to make dirty hair look great for days on end (#lifegoals). You’re independent, strong, charismatic, compassionate, vivacious, and unique, and I am so proud to call you my sister.
Even when you laugh – that loud, obnoxious laugh – and everyone in the room turns to look and I want to duck my head in embarrassment. Even when you cry and no one is quite sure what you’re crying about because weren’t you just laughing 30 seconds ago? Even when you’ve had too much to drink and it takes you 45 minutes to tell a story about drying pants that were too big.
Because, sister, you’re so intensely joyous that people can’t help but want to stand in your light.
I know this day, your wedding day, will be one of the happiest days of your life. I know you’ll dance until your feet hurt and kiss your new husband a thousand times. I know that you’ll hug a hundred people and you won’t care (much) when you spill a drink on your dress. I know you’ll be overwhelmed by love. I know it will end too soon and not soon enough. I know you’ll be totally overwhelmed by love and happiness. I know you’ll laugh and cry and drink too much. I know this day will be one of the greatest of your entire life.
And I know I’ll be a mess as I stand by alternately laughing and crying (and maybe also drinking a bit too much). Please don’t mind me – I just heard the funniest story about oversized pants from my radiant little sister who’s marrying a Jedi, and I’ve never been more pleased to be a big sister in all my life.